Funny Quotes

 TimeFavorites

The avoidance of taxes is the only intellectual pursuit that carries any reward.

John Maynard Keynes

Very few people do anything creative after the age of thirty-five. The reason is that very few people do anything creative before the age of thirty-five.

Joel Hildebrand

Give a man a fish, and you`ll feed him for a day. Teach a man to fish, and he`ll buy a funny hat. Talk to a hungry man about fish, and you`re a consultant.

Scott Adams

2

Prediction is difficult, especially the future.

Niels Bohr

Your hand and your mouth agreed many years ago that, as far as chocolate is concerned, there is no need to involve your brain.

Dave Barry

4

[He] hated reality but realized it was still the only place to get a good steak.

Woody Allen

The secret to creativity is knowing how to hide your sources.

Albert Einstein

2

A hen is only an egg`s way of making another egg.

Samuel Butler

The public would believe anything - so long as it is not founded on truth.

Edith Sitwell

Man is a Religious Animal. He is the only Religious Animal. He is the only animal that has the True Religion - several of them.

Mark Twain

It has been said that man is a rational animal. All my life I have been searching for evidence which could support this.

Bertrand Russell

The point about zero is that we do not need to use it in the operation of daily life. No one goes out to buy zero fish.

Alfred North Whitehead

A physicist is just an atom's way of looking at itself.

Niels Bohr

The New Age? It`s just the old age stuck in a microwave oven for fifteen seconds.

James Randi

My young son asked me what happens after we die. I told him we get buried under a bunch of dirt and worms eat our bodies. I guess I should have told him the truth - that most of us go to Hell and burn eternally - but I didn't want to upset him.

Jack Handey

1
Accept

We use cookies to personalise ads and to analyse our traffic. We also share information about your use of our site with our advertising and analytics partners. By using our site, you accept the use of these cookies. See details